When people say that the image of the perfect Housewife is unobtainable, their primary focus is almost always on the expectation that we look good while we're "doing it all".
According to most, it's sexist to expect those around us to look well put together to any extent at all- but doubly so if the person that you're expecting to look nice and cleanly is a woman. And to those same people, it's also impossible altogether; another one of the expectations that are wholly unrealistic, which no singular person in existence can actually achieve in their eyes.
Click Here To Read Part 1
Taking pride in your appearance isn't necessarily a bad thing, though. Indeed, it has many benefits that are both social and psychological. Psychologically, we often even feel better about ourselves and are more motivated when we feel that we look good, and are happy with our appearance. And these effects hold true in scientific literature regardless of whether or not you conform to any modern beauty standards or cultural norms, decide to look good for yourself or another, are conventionally attractive, and so on and so forth.
Like with everything, however, it's not for everyone. For some it is legitimately impossible to obtain- especially because of disability and income, which have always been variables in the accessibility of aesthetics. Others simply don't wish to, and that is perfectly fine ... But like with the image of the perfect so-called "traditional Housewife" as a whole? Looking good while "performing the role" isn't actually as unobtainable a goal or ideal as the naysayers harp on it being.
A good portion of it hearkens back to just a few of the keys of success that I spoke about in that earlier article: Personal Enjoyment, Time Management, and a solid Routine. And so if making your aesthetics an important part of your routine isn't something that you care to do or place emphasis on as a Homemaker, then feel free to disregard this post. But if it's something that you are interested in? Here's another 3 keys of success that I feel are important pertaining to this area.
⚶ The 10-to-15 Minute Rule ⚶
For this to work, you absolutely must know what your personal aesthetic priorities are. In other words, what are your "absolute musts" that have to be completed before you fell like you've put yourself together and feel well groomed?
Are you the type of person who refuses to leave the house without at least a touch of mascara or lipstick? The kind who absolutely must be wearing Perfume before they think they're acceptable, regardless of the state of anything else? Or is a clean face and well groomed brows all you need? Whatever you are, figure it out.
Once you've established your priorities, practice makes perfect: Work on whittling your routine down until it takes you just 10 or 15 minutes (or less, even) to complete it in its entirety.
With everything we consider essential today, however, you might say that 10 to 15 minutes to get dressed, do your hair, and do your makeup (if you choose to do all three) is asinine; an impossible task to accomplish for anyone. It's not, however. Just being well organized and simplifying your routine works well enough to take care of the vast majority of obstacles most people think are in their way.
For instance, I know the exact location of all of my clothing, and my closets are organized in a way that allows me to put together the day's outfit and dress myself in just two minutes. But if I really want to be efficient, I simply lay my clothes out the day beforehand as I'm getting ready for bed. Likewise, my bathroom stock is organized in such a way that I can always find my products- and they're arranged in order of use, making doing my skincare routine as simple as moving down the line on the shelf; I've even put together an "essentials" pack for myself concerning makeup items I use regularly- and that stays in the drawer year round. Furthermore, I just don't keep superfluous items around that I don't care for, and so I don't have to riffle around through excess at any point in the process.
Don't get me wrong ... I used to go for the overly complicated hygienic routines. After focusing on my priorities, however, I've since cut a large portion of the fluff from the day to day. I just don't need it; now-a-days the more in depth pampering that I enjoy is reserved for my Self Care Days, and my average daily routine takes only 7 minutes from start to finish.
With enough planning- and trial and error- it's certainly something that you can make work if you're interested in making it work in the first place.
⚶ Fitting it into your larger routine ⚶
If you actively want to take steps to looking nicer on daily average, then whittling your routine into something that can be accomplished in only 10 to 15 minutes does nothing unless you can actually perform it regularly. If not, then all the effort you put into perfecting it and making it manageable is null. But frankly you can't just stuff it anywhere in your routine. You have to find a place in your routine where it actually works for you, and feels natural to accomplish.
In my own experience, the mornings work best for me ... Before integrating my beauty routine, my standard routine was to wake up, fold down the covers of the bed, make myself a cup of coffee, and veg out in front of the computer for a few hours. Integrating my beauty routine with my normal morning routine, however, now means that I wake up and lay my clothes out on the bed before making my way to the bathroom. On my way there I'll turn the computer on for the day and start myself a cup of Coffee or Tea- both of which are a single button push as I move through the house. As the Keurig brews I perform the bathroom portion of my routine. And when finished, I snag my cup on the way back to the bedroom and put it at my computer desk, get dressed, and finally turn down the bed covers.
It's seamless, it's effective, and I feel great about accomplishing a few basic tasks in the process of simply waking up. Better yet, it gets performed every day because it's an active part of a morning routine that I was already performing.
Ultimately it doesn't matter where you work it in, though, as long as it's positioned whenever is the best and most logical in regards to your greater routine- and so long as it is accomplished at least on most days. And so for you, this may be after you've gotten the housework complete for the day, before you leave the house for errands, or even after you have had your morning coffee; assimilate it seamlessly into your routine in a logical, flowing manner that's easy for you to remember and complete.
⚶ Make it a habit ⚶
Making it a habit is also important; simply adding it to your routine does nothing if you're skipping it every other day- ergo, if you enjoy it and want to regularly perform it, it must also become a habit that you're completing regularly.
The easiest way to do this is to simply not skimp on it- especially not at first, during the most important time frame for habit establishment; even if you feel that you emotionally unmotivated, it's important to force yourself to do so if, overall, it is genuinely what you want to do. Often times, even, I've actually found that forcing myself to perform the aesthetic portion of my routine when I feel bad helps to lift my mood and give me the emotional gumption I need to complete the rest of my daily tasks- which can be incredibly important as a disabled person; a lot really can be said about the psychological good that looking put together can do for your motivation and confidence.
More than these, though, is the importance of staying healthy. Adequately hydrating yourself, eating well, exercising regularly, and properly learning to take care of your body on the overall biological, aesthetic, and other levels is the core component to looking (and feeling) great in may ways. Especially if you're disabled or chronically ill ... These, however, are not just limited to a 10 to 15 minute daily routine, but are lifestyle changes that must be considered and maintained for optimal health- which also happen to do wonders for your enjoyment and appearance as a byproduct.
For an audio transcript of this post, you can now listen on Youtube!